by Ariana Hoet, Ph.D., and Whitney Raglin Bignall, Ph.D, the Kids Mental Health Foundation
Since the pandemic, we continue to hear concerns about kids and their mental health at school. Those concerns include increased isolation, loneliness, feelings of anxiety, school avoidance, and a widening gap in academic achievement.
One way to help protect the mental health of children this back-to-school season is through connection. When kids feel connected at school, it improves their mental health by:
- Improving their grades/scores
- Building self-confidence
- Keeping them engaged
- Reducing risky behaviors (like violence or substance use)
- Reducing loneliness, anxiety, and depression
And both parents and teachers have a role in helping kids feel like they are connected and belong.
How Parents Can Help Build Connection at School
1. Show interest in your child’s life at school
Ask your child how school is going and try to keep questions open-ended versus yes/no questions. You might ask about who they spend time with at school and what they do together, what projects they’re working on, or something fun they learned this week. Try to give kids your full attention so you can absorb what they’re saying.
When you can, follow up a day or two later with a question about that group project, a test they have coming up, or a teacher they enjoy. This shows that you’ve listened and that you care about their school life.
2. Encourage school friendships
Relationships with others at school will help them feel like they are part of something bigger. Teach your children social skills (like patiently waiting for their turn or thinking of how someone else might feel), how to make new friends, and what healthy friendships look like. Talk about how they can make plans outside of school, and how they can ask for parental contact information.
3. Involve yourself in the school community
Ask the school office or check the school’s website for a calendar of events so you have the dates of breaks, conferences, events and other important dates. Show up to the school as much as your schedule allows. Attend a curriculum night to meet their teacher, go to a game or after-school concert performance, or volunteer at an event. When your schedule is limited, small actions like emailing the teacher to introduce yourself and find out what the classroom needs are can also go a long way.
How Educators Can Help Build Connection at School
1. Get to know each student
You can use classroom conversation starters to get to know students in a group setting. Taking the time to greet them as an individual or ask them a follow-up question about something that they’ve shared can give students a feeling of being important and belonging.
2. Help kids work together
When students feel closer to their peers, they will also have an increased sense of belonging and connection. Encourage them to get to know one another through projects or activities. As a teacher, you may notice when a student is being left out or is isolating. Supporting that student in finding like-minded friends or noticing their strengths through different classroom activities can have an important impact on their mental health.
3. Set a positive vision
Your expectations for your students, and how you share those expectations, are important to their confidence and success. If you feel confident that they can do well in the classroom and share the strengths you notice in them, students can feel welcomed and accepted.
Find more ideas and free downloads for parents and teachers at KidsMentalHealthFoundation.org.
Ariana Hoet, Ph.D., is the executive clinical director of the Kids Mental Health Foundation and a pediatric psychologist at Nationwide Children’s Hospital. Dr. Hoet works at a Primary Care Center where she serves primarily Latino and Somali immigrant children.
Whitney J. Raglin Bignall, Ph.D., is the associate clinical director of the Kids Mental Health Foundation. Dr. Raglin Bignall works with families at a Nationwide Children’s Primary Care Center, which serves a primarily low-income and racially diverse community.
The Kids Mental Health Foundation is the leading organization promoting mental health for children in the United States. To achieve its vision to build a world where mental health is a vital part of every child’s upbringing, more than 1,000 mental health professionals and researchers at Nationwide Children’s Hospital, in partnership with other trusted experts, provide real-world knowledge and expertise to power the Foundation’s free educational videos, guides and curriculum.