Obsessive thinking and rumination can be overlooked symptoms of bipolar — here’s how readers recognize the signs and find ways to keep them in check.
When it comes to a new idea or hobby, there’s a difference between having a healthy amount of enthusiasm for it and becoming obsessed with it. With bipolar disorder, obsessive thoughts and rumination are common, yet not always talked about, symptoms of the mental health condition.
Not only can rumination and obsessive thoughts impact your mindset, but they can also impact your relationships with others, such as loved ones and coworkers.
Plus, since rumination can sometimes be overlooked as a symptom of bipolar disorder, it can be difficult to see when a thought turns into an obsessive thought.
Fortunately, there are ways to spot the warning signs and address the obsessive tendencies before they spiral out of control. We asked bpHope readers how they deal with obsessive thoughts and behaviors, and here’s what they shared.
Editor’s note: Comments have been edited for length and clarity.
I Set a Timer and Make Myself Take a Short Physical Break
I get excessively focused on both ideas and activities, particularly when in an elevated mood state. I’ve learned to manage this by setting a timer for myself during these periods and taking a short physical break from my environment and what I’m doing. I’ll either go outside for a walk with my music on for about a half-hour or go into a different room to quietly do some yoga poses and stretches. This “enforced interruption” — doing activities I love — consistently breaks the hyper-focused state for me.
— P.L., Connecticut
I Talk to Someone About What I’m Obsessing Over
This is one of the prominent indicators of my elevated mood. Talking about whatever I’m obsessing about with my wife or a friend is most helpful. Saying it out loud, processing it, and getting perspective allows me to put it to rest. When she is not around, or I seem to not be able to pull out of it, well, it’s a matter of time, usually.
— Name Withheld
I Try to Catch My Obsessions Early So I Do Not Give In to Them
My obsessive thoughts revolve around hair, makeup, clothes, crafts (a big project, making gifts, or a million-dollar idea to sell), and farm/home improvement projects I think will be so easy, but are probably above my abilities. How I notice it’s an obsessive idea is that it pushes me to the store to buy supplies — which usually don’t get used. The key might be catching it early before it gets to an obsession, because if the idea ruminates too long, it seems that nothing can stop me.
— H.M., Washington
I Try to Avoid the Obsessive Thoughts, but Can’t
When I start getting obsessive thoughts during manic times, they’re always the most bizarre, strangest things. Last summer, around 3 a.m. on another sleepless night, I decided I needed to dye my hair. I ultimately didn’t want to dye my hair, since I had just gotten it back to its natural color. But when I get these thoughts, I can’t do anything to get them to go away, and it physically hurts my stomach because it stresses me out so badly. Anyway, I ended up dyeing my hair and turning it orange.
— J. H., West Virginia
Obsessing Over Things Is a Vicious Cycle That Makes Me Feel Unsatisfied
Sometimes, I don’t notice my obsessive thoughts until they get out of control. For example, I will set my sights on a vacation, then eat, sleep, and breathe, planning for a vacation that may be a year away. Sometimes, I feel depressed when the thing I’d been obsessed with is over, because it had been my main focus. Then I have to find something else to obsess over in order to feel satisfied. It’s a vicious cycle and, very often, leaves me feeling unsatisfied with life.
— E.B., Michigan
I Identify the Obsession and Then Break It Down Into Smaller Ones
This is an often overlooked symptom of bipolar, and it is very difficult to see for yourself if you do not look for warning signs. If you can catch yourself before you become totally, excessively focused on an idea or activity during elevated moods, you can redirect the energy with a quick-solve list: identify the obsession, then break it down and make it smaller (easier to complete). Ask yourself, “Why is this important above all else?” Complete a small part of the event/idea/thought and let it pass.
— K.O., Oregon
My Obsessions Take Over My Life and Can Last for Months
This particular adverse effect of bipolar is the strongest — and most dysfunctional — symptom in my life. As a college student, I believe that having any obsession beyond studies and social comforts can be detrimental. My entire life becomes hard-wired toward any means to the end. It could be adopting a dog, reconnecting with an ex-girlfriend, becoming a gym fanatic, or having one specific thought or premonition. These obsessions can last months, until I stumble out.
— A.B.
Giving in to My Obsession Will Only Make Me Feel Better in the Short-Term
When I get in one of those moods where everything sounds like a good idea or where I’m super focused, I try and reason with myself. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. Having a great support system helps me. My husband will tell me, “I know you want to do this, but it will only make you feel better for a little bit.” My aunt has also suggested making a pros and cons list, which I think is a very helpful suggestion.
— K.K., Texas
I Learn All I Can About Whatever Topic I’m Obsessing Over
I obsess over everything when I’m a bit manic. I quilt and sew on vintage machines, and I can tell you nearly everything you ever wanted (or didn’t want) to know about both subjects. I get like a sponge and soak up every iota of information I can about whatever subject I’m into for that moment. I have done this about vape mods, my dog, actors, movies, authors, local news stories, and so on. My family jokes that I’m full of useless information.
— T.W., Texas
The Obsessing Takes Over My Life and Affects My Relationships
This happens quite often, generally in clusters of subjects. I hate it — it hurts my brain. The intensity is definitely something that keeps others from liking me. I either voice my opinion, wait out the thoughts, sleep, stay away from others, or drive my family nuts with my talking.
— K.R., Colorado
My Obsessive Thoughts Are So Prevalent, They Feel Like My ‘Normal’
I’ve been dealing with obsessive thoughts for so long, it feels like my “normal.” Strangely, it can be especially pronounced with music. I will obsessively circle a certain album for months on end — on repeat. Not your typical, “I enjoy this, so I’ll replay it.” It’s very difficult to explain.
— N.B., Facebook
Deep Breathing and Meditation Help Curb My Racing Thoughts
Obsessive and racing thoughts have kept me awake many nights. Through years of therapy, I’ve learned that deep breathing and focusing on a particularly pleasant memory — or a place where I have found serenity (through meditating) — often helps. Prayer also works. If nothing else works, I choose a project to occupy my mind and just stay up until I get sleepy.
— S.B., Arizona
The Questions I Ask Myself to Stay in Check
Becoming obsessively caught up in an idea or a project is usually a sign for me that my mind is running off in the wrong direction again. It took me a long time to fully appreciate the positive outcomes of these bursts of creativity, while also closely monitoring them. I check myself by continually asking, “Can I walk away from this? Can I stop thinking about this?” If the answer is “Yes,” then I leave it alone. If the answer is “No,” then I seek help to control what has become unhealthy hypomania.
— K.H., Texas
Mindfulness Helps Me Become Aware of When Obsessions Are Setting In
Mindfulness has equipped me with an awareness of when obsessions are setting in, so I can act early. Nowadays, if I find myself focusing solely on one idea or activity, I immediately take a step back, gently remind myself that I can return to it after an hour or two, and then do something else I would usually find enjoyable, in order to break the cycle. I then schedule times I can freely engage in the activity I desperately want to do, while ensuring I do other activities, as well.
— K.F., Australia
I Get Hyper-Focused on Something, to a Fault
I will get hyper-focused on something, which is both good and bad. When I was younger, I bought a new bike and headed out, riding just a few miles. Before long, I was riding 30 miles a day. Then I needed better equipment. I was soon spending money I didn’t have on bike gear. I did the same with exercising — it’s all I thought about. I wanted to be like the “big guys.” I began buying illegal steroids, taking drugs I knew nothing about, spending money I didn’t have, and putting my life, and future, at risk.
— J.B., Missouri
When Crafts Become All-Consuming
I frequently become obsessed with activities, especially crafts. I am currently obsessed with beads and making bracelets. I have collected thousands of beads. I like to touch them, and I look at them constantly. I put together color combinations in my head and don’t pay attention to anything else. This will go on until the next thing catches my interest.
— C.R., Ohio
The Fine Line Between Total Focus and Obsession
I see the question in two different aspects — being “totally focused” versus “obsessively focused.” I have little doubt that bipolar disorder has allowed me to be totally focused on the major aspects of my business, sometimes to excess, which caused problems in my family life. With great psychiatric support, I maintained a stable enough life to build a successful business over 30 years. By the time I was 58, I could no longer run my business; I was having three major depressions a year. No doubt, stress had a big impact on my bipolar disorder.
— T.B., Montana
I Become Aware of My Intrusive Thoughts, Take Medication, and Pray
I totally obsess when in elevated moods, but also when in depressed moods. In my depressed moods, my obsession is over negative, intrusive thoughts, which are false and most damaging. Knowing this, in and of itself, is helpful. To further overcome this problem, I take medication and pray. I’m also searching for better ways to help me ease the obsession.
— E.G.F., California
I Obsess Over Random Objects for Weeks and ‘Have to’ Have Them
When I’m manic — the “fun” manic — I get obsessed with random objects. A shiny green frog ring, an orange glass octopus — just unique items that catch my manic eye, usually in stores, and I obsess over them for weeks. It’s an “I gotta have it, I gotta have it, it’s so awesome” kind of deal. Could be worse — I could be trying to chase an actual octopus.
— J. L., Arkansas
UPDATED: Printed as “SoundOFF! on Obsessions,” Fall 2017