Is narcissism always harmful, or can some traits support stronger, more stable relationships over time?
A new study from Michigan State University is reshaping how researchers understand narcissism in relationships, challenging the widespread belief that narcissistic traits inevitably erode partnerships over time.
Drawing on long-term data from more than 5,000 couples, the researchers followed participants for as long as six years. Individuals completed detailed surveys assessing two key aspects of narcissism—admiration, which reflects confidence and charm, and rivalry, which involves competitiveness and hostility.
Two Sides of Narcissism: Seeking Admiration vs Asserting Superiority
“Narcissists have two different ways to maintain their inflated positive self-perceptions,” said Gwendolyn Seidman, lead author of the study and associate professor in MSU’s Department of Psychology. “They can puff themselves up by trying to impress others (narcissistic admiration) or they can put other people down to show they are superior to them (narcissistic rivalry).”
Published in the Journal of Personality, the study found that narcissistic rivalry traits were consistently linked to lower relationship satisfaction for both partners, but contrary to earlier research, narcissistic admiration had no meaningful effect on either partner’s satisfaction.
In addition, the study found that the rate of decline was no steeper for couples where one partner scored highly on narcissism. This suggests that long-term effects of narcissism on romantic relationships may unfold in ways that are more nuanced than previously thought.v
The study also looked at couples who had been together for a year or less — and found that narcissistic traits showed no association with satisfaction at all.
Study Challenges Assumptions About How Narcissists Affect Relationships Over Time
“People often assume that narcissists are charming at first but gradually damage their relationships over time. Our findings suggest that the reality may be more complicated,” said Seidman.
“Perhaps there is some turning point in the relationship where things change and satisfaction nosedives or perhaps the ‘honeymoon’ phase with narcissists is longer. Another possibility is that the harm caused by narcissists doesn’t show up directly in their partners’ overall relationship satisfaction. For example, narcissists may gradually erode their partners’ self-esteem or sense of agency.”
The researchers hope that by understanding how personality traits shape relationship experiences, clinicians and other researchers can better understand why some relationships struggle and how partners influence each other’s well-being over time.
Source-Eurekalert